I just finished reading the eulogy for Steve Jobs, written by his sister, Mona Simpson, striving to muffle my tears as Gracelyn slept just feet away. When I read what his final words were, I thought those could be the words I utter hundreds of times a day marveling, “Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow.” as my dear daughter sparkles herself through life. Like Jobs I am entranced by beauty, which, for me is embodied by this sprite-like girl who takes in life through every pore on her skin, absorbing this still-new world around her.
Gracelyn is so alive, present, real, tangible. Watching her I see what it means to discover the outer world. Listening to her I hear what it means to give voice to the inner world. She is my omnipresent reminder to let yesterday fade so as to be open to today. With Gracelyn as my guide I am repeatedly evoked to trust love, life, and my own inner knowing. She is undeniably the most skilled and wisest teacher I’ve ever had (and I’ve had many quality teachers along the way).
In part this post is simply a statement about how an amazing soul, housed in the body of my little girl, is reawakening me to the beautiful journey of life. For me however, it’s also an opportunity to avow two truths about this adventure I’m on as Gracelyn’s mama.
- I am blessed to be here, each and every day, each and every moment. Some moments I resist or screw up, yet most are welcomed, savored, and lived with grace. Regardless, being here with her is the best gift of my life.
- Being here for Gracelyn is one of my highest aspirations as a mama. Emotionally and physically I want to be open and available for her as she needs me to be — present and real, welcoming who she is in each moment instead of taking her for granted or forgetting to rediscover her anew each day.